I can never decide do i love or hate rain

I can never decide do I love or hate
rain!
Some days its gloomy, some days just plain.

The raindrops are like a musical chain,

which binds me in an unearthly train.

Either it relieves or stresses the pain,

neither do i lose anything nor do i gain.

The cold makes me shiver,yet gives a pleasing feat.

Dancing to its tunes,I give away myself to it.

Humming a song, I sway away to another place.

With no one to stop me,i be moving in grace.

Sometimes I sit alone in my room & think of a beloved.

Wondering should I keep the curtains open or have them covered!

Else i put my head through the window to see the tress toil,

Feels heavenly to breathe in the smell of fresh soil.

Its raining again, I can see the dark clouds taking over the sky.

Should I cover myself in a blanket & sleep or should I watch the rain drops falling by?

I really can't decide do I love or hate rain, 

Coz somedays its gloomy, somedays just plain.

INCIDENTAL COMICS: Rainy Daydream

INCIDENTAL COMICS: Rainy Daydream:

Supplementary

Life goes blurry,
All you do is worry,
And pack your things in a hurry,
To write that supplementary!

Some feel sorry,
Others wish to be run over by a lorry,
But we all feel worried
When fate gifts us a supplementary.

Passing marks we hope to get & pray,
Knowing nothing in the corridors we stray,
Staring at each other in exam hall we stay,
And after an hour in canteen, samosa's bill we pay.

Beside the hay we yet come & sit every morning,
To smile at each other & watch crowds churning.
With every minute feeling something in us burning,
Just say additional sheet & you'd see every head turning.

A few fall in this trap by chance,
Then be forced to obey the rules of this hall dance.
It has become a relation of never ending romance,
Between us & that never ending supplementary.

Every year while walking in again,
Willing to take every risk some copy some sit regretting it in pain.
With only having a pen to defend,
This tag attached to us we students someday wish to end.

Without a word

I shouldn't have done that
I should've ignored it
Like something I could not see
Like something I cannot see
Ah... yeah
I shouldn't have ever looked at you
I should've ran away
I should've acted like I didn't hear
Like something I could not hear
Like something I cannot hear ah... yeah... 
I shouldn't have listened to my heart at all
Without a word
You showed me what love is
Without a word
You gave me your love
You even made me hold my breath
Waiting for you
But you ran away like this
Without a word, you left me
Without a word, you threw me away
What should I say next?
My closed lips were surprised
Coming without words

Why does it hurt so much?
Why does it keep on hurting me?
Even though you're not here anymore
Though everything is the same
Without a word
You showed me love

Without a word
You gave me your love
You made me hold my breath
Waiting for you
But you run away like this
Without a word, you left me
Without a word you threw me away
What should I say next?
My closed lips were surprised
Without a word my tears fell
Without a word my heart breaks

Without a word, I will wait for your love
Without a word, I'm hurt because of love
I zone out
I became a fool
I cried as I look up at the sky
Without a word, goodbyes found me
Without a word, goodbyes came to me
I think my heart was surprised
I couldn't even prepare to send you away
Without a word it came
Without a word it went
Without a word it left
Like a fever before
I'll only hurt you for a while
And will only left you scars in the end

Courtesy: Korean movie

Someday

I don’t know how much longer
That I have to put up with everything
I’ve been hiding all the truth inside my heart
Everytime we meet
Everytime you turn face to me
Though I look indifferent
Do you know how much i have to force myself?
Can you hear my heart calling for you, loving you?
But I can’t open my heart for anyone to know
Can you hear it?
My heart keeps waiting there for you
Waiting for you open it
and hope you will realize..
Someday

Though I love you
Though I feel
but deep down inside, I don’t dare to tell you
Everytime we meet
Everytime you turn face to me
Though I look indifferent
Do you know how much i have to force myself?

Can you hear my heart calling for you, loving you?
But I can’t open my heart for anyone to know
Can you hear it?
My heart keeps waiting there for you
Waiting for you open it
and hope you will realize..
Someday

Can you hear my heart calling for you, loving you?
But I can’t open my heart for anyone to know
Can you hear it?
My heart keeps waiting there for you
Waiting for you open it
And I hope you will realize
That this person loves you
Please I hope you will know
Someday

(Courtesy: a Thai film song)

The never ending search

In the land of bliss we search for happiness but find sorrow.
The more we wander the darker it gets, it starts feeling that there's no tomorrow.
Rising & falling in the unknown darkness we lurch,
To find nothing in the end of this never ending search.
Our bodies decay & soul rues,
A new ray of light emerges again & the search continues.

If we were childhood friends

If we were childhood friends,
We'd play together & ride on swings.
Run around in an alley green,
Fight forever on our curious dreams.

I'll doze off hearing your explanations,
You'd get bored handling my drama occasions,
Time would fly by tolerating each other,
Annoyed or not we'd always stick together.

I'd know you better to read your mind,
To sense your heart that's soft & kind.
To erase any pain that ever shook you by,
I'll mend it all, will never let you cry.

We'd grow up together feeling aspirations new,
Wondering the secret to the morning dew.
Exploring the world side by side,
Appreciating our finds with a sense of pride.

Learning the bitter truths of life,
Stuck somewhere in this hypocritic strife,
Searching for each other in this crowd,
We'll roam around seeking peace in the world loud.

Only to miss our childhood days,
The innocent smiles over sunlight rays.
With at least one person to rely upon,
The friend who understood & never judged us wrong.

If we were childhood friends,
I'd never have left you alone to ever have a depression.
I'll take away your pain & give you my happiness in return,
You'd stay in my heart forever,
as a best friend till the end.

I miss you

I miss the days that never happened,
I miss the things that never were,
The land, the shore, the wind, the fragrance,
The perfect moments that never were.

I miss your smile when you looked at me,
I miss the eyes into which I can fall so deep,
Your face, your lips, the flawlessness you own,
I miss the togetherness that was never meant to be.

I miss the love that was never there,
I miss the connection that we shared,
The touch, the kiss, the realm of romance,
I miss the time we sat together holding hands.

I miss words that were never spoken,
I miss your heartbeats in my heart which lies broken,
I miss a lot that isn't true,
But more than any of these, I miss you.

Heartless

Heartless, I wish I was,
To know not what to feel is.
For it hurts to love & not be loved back,
To have feelings, that are best in us kept packed.

You can't complain,
Then it'd only grow stronger.
If you run away from it,
It's gonna stay there longer.
The more you resist, the more deeper you fall.
Never to realise its an endless pall.

Funny things these feelings are,
They make you laugh & cry together,
You sing & dance to the tunes of it,
& cry in depression too lying on the leather.

Some express it & it brings them bloom,
They think they'd never need anything further.
Others don't, it sways them in gloom,
& the gloomy days follow, one after another.

Either way it teaches us lessons,
With regrets & the pain that follow.
Some move on & be stronger,
Others lie there broken, all hollow.

I'm one such person,
A victim of feelings,
away from them I always fled,
& now I believe I'll use my last breath, to say the words that were never said.

Would it be too late by then? Or is it already?
I do not know.
Heartless, I wish I was,
To know not what to feel is.
For it does really hurt to love & not be loved back,
To have feelings, only to be kept packed.

The secret I've within

The secret I've within,
into which the world peeks in,
Neither is it a lie nor a deadly sin,
Its a key to a world where my heart lies in.

The secret I've within,
Into which I entrusted many in,
some let it go, some others kept it in,
The rest I guess, dumped it in a bin.

The secret I've within,
Into which I still be lost in.
Pointless or not it'd stay there waiting,
engraved in my heart forever, till it stops beating.

There's more to know that what we know

There's more to know of the world around,
More to see than the sight to which I'm bound.
More to listen than what's audible,
More to feel than the things sensible.
More to say than things said.
More to read than words read.
More to hear & more to tell,
More to ourselves than what we foretell.

Walking on this path unknown,
I've realized there's more to everything than what I've ever known.
Confined in myself I forget the larger picture around,
Of which I'm a part of, to which in someway I'm bound.
But not anymore would I neglect,
Anything ever to which I connect.
Its pain today but happiness too somewhere awaits,
Because there's more to this life, than what our fate states.

Khamoshi

Iss Dil ne dekha ek chotta sa khwab,
Chaaha bas tumhara saath..
Kar na payi kabhi shabdon me bayan,
Par bolti thi har waqt meri khamosh zuban.

Tum samajh toh na sake par ye tumhe samjhathi rehi,
Tumhari baatein iss Dil ko lubhati rehi,
Tumhe soch har waqt main mann hi mann muskurati rehi,
Tumhari hi yaadon me khoi ye geet main khud se gungunati rehi.

Soorat pe toh laakho marte hai,
Kisi ke seeyat ne aaj aisa lubhaya tha.
Duniya, zamane, har rishte se pare ho jau,
Pehli baar kisi pe itna pyaar aaya tha.

Phir bhi chup rehi zubaan kyuki khona nahi tha tumhe,
Tum aur tumhari dosti iss had taq bha gayi thi humein.
Par aaj bhi Dil me chaayi rehti hai ye madhoshi,
Ki kabhi na kabhi toh tum samjhoge,..meri ye khamoshi.

Search

I don't know how long..,
I don't know how more..
Fighting the waves I row..,
Seeking a land..a shore..
For months I have been stuck..,
In the middle of nowhere I duck..
With salt water tossing me up & down..,
Everyday I silently moan..
Over the day I took this path..,
Entered a known tempest of wrath..

In darkness bound in chains..,

I cry aloud drenched in pains..

There is no escape..no hope that I'll survive..,

Seeking death I wonder, should into this ocean I dive?

All exhausted in this boat I perch..,

To let time end my never ending search.

A thought i thought

Sometimes easy is complicated,
And fair unfair.
You don't have to lie to accept the truth,
Whatever may it be, its people's logic to stare.
I never loved you, I just loved the idea of being in love,
And now I wonder, was it necessary? All this shove?
Hypocrisy is something all the adults gradually learn,
If you don't want to, remain a kid & never ever give it much concern.
Too much in mind, should I make a peace or war?
Unable to escape, my thoughts colliding are waiting at the door.
Now I don't care am I alone or that the path was taken up by only a very few,
With the little courage I've gained & learning from all that that ever pained, I'll start again on a journey new.

Regret

I don't know how long..,
I don't know how more..
Fighting the waves I row..,
Seeking a land..a shore..
For months I have been stuck..,
In the middle of nowhere I duck..
With salt water tossing me up & down..,
I everyday in silence moan..
The day i entered this unknown path..,
I knew of the tempest & the for coming wrath..
But yet I defied my mind..& fled with my heart..,
Only to end up more wounded.. Alone..& tore apart..
Never wanted to reach this phase..in the delusion of desires I fret..,
Hoping for joy to reside lifetime..I forever for this mistake will regret.

Let it be this way!

Sometimes I wish I could just say..but then I guess its better this way.
I don't wanna hurt you by telling you anyway..if friendship is what you want let it be this way.
I can't stop loving you though its too late for me to back away.. Forgetting you seems impossible, in my heart till it stops beating you'll stay.
I know you won't love me ever coz you already love someone else you say..but even that's not affecting my feelings for you, i can't stop my love coming your way.
But I would never say a word I know..can't bear to lose you that way.
My love would rest in my heart forever and if this is what you want let it be this way.

Tum nahi samjhe..shayad khuda ki marzi thi

Tum nahi samjhe..shayad khuda ki marzi thi..,
Tumhe kabhi dikha hi nhi...tumhari hi khudgarzi thi...
Shayad andhe ko bhi dikh jaata..itna toh wo bhi samajh jaata..,
Kis had tak chaaha hai tumhe..par kehne se darti thi..
Kho na dun tumhe..ye soch chup rehti thi..,
Pyaar nahi bas saath chahe..din raat tumhe yaad karti thi...,
Kabhi toh samjha hota..ki bas tumse..sirf tumse pyaar karti thi..,
kabhi toh socha hota..ke na bol payi.. kyuki tumhe..bas khone se darti thi...
Par tum nahi samjhe..aur na kabhi samjhoge..,
shayad yehi...khuda ki marzi thi.

I forget to remember

I forget to remember the truth,
But when I do I wish it remained forgotten.
Its better being swayed all day in one's imaginations, than being shown that that there is nothing left of your aspirations.
Even that small ray of hope i thought i saw, was some drawing daylight going under the shaw.
I realise there is nothing left for me here, the land i once thought was all mine to bear.
I'm standing in the same place I stood that day when I had a choice, I chose wrong I know but now I can do nothing here.
I sometimes try & forget that any of this ever happened, but then I get reminded..& I wish, that it all went forgotten.

It was all just a..Dream

And then I realised it was all just a dream...when I woke up again hearing reality scream,
It doesn't matter how far I run...surrendering myself back here I have to return,
For the never ending pain to drench me again...& eyes pleading for tears to endlessly rain,
Searching desperately for a way to let go...the truth won't change & in time I'll get used to it I know.
But I still can't help swaying away to my thought's theme...only to wake up again & realise it was all just a dream.